I have said so many times that I would love to know her story of how the LORD “turned her heart of stone to a heart of flesh!”

Thanks for being transparent enough to allow an e-friendship that glorifies the LORD for so many!

His maturity now astounds me. He refuses to allow me or my husband to take one bit of blame for his former waywardness. “This is 100% my fault, because I wanted this.” He said, “It is not your fault, it is not the public school’s fault, it is not the other kids’ fault…it is my fault.”

I think, Kelly, that I WANT it to be my fault. I WANT to think that it was because I made all the wrong decisions (never mind that we prayed about every decision). Anything but face the fact that my son has a fallen nature.

James 1:14 says, “But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.”

NO! Not my baby! I don’t want to face the truth that when I gave birth to him, I brought a human being with a fallen nature into the world. I would rather take the blame for any wrong that he has done. I love my child so much. Blame me, Lord! Not my child! I’ll take the punishment.

But, we are all fallen, and while people/places/things are an INFLUENCE for good or bad, they are not the CAUSE. WE are drawn away by our own lusts and enticed, we must take the final blame after all the explanations and excuses have been made, and only Jesus Christ can take the punishment for our sins.

Now, of course, I am NOT saying that we shouldn’t make every effort to put good influences before our children. That is our parental duty. It gives our children a good foundation to come back to, should they, God forbid, stray. Don’t ever say, “What’s the use…it doesn’t matter.”

My son assures me that he would not have allowed me to homeschool him, and if I had tried, he would have run away from home many years ago, and been out on the streets at 15. Because we tried to make life as ordinary as possible for him (he was a hard-headed, unusual child) and put all the restraints on him that we could, he stuck around until he was 20, and of age.

So, if I had it to do over again, I would make the same choices that I did. You can’t tighten up enough on some young people; some of them simply have to “get things out of their systems” and “beat themselves up” before they fully submit to God. I’m afraid I’ve been there, too. Why should my child be any different? He takes after me!

To assume that, if we put our children in a perfect environment, they won’t “mess up” is to assume from the start that “humans are basically good.” That is what “the liberals” think, and they are wrong. Humans are born with a sinful nature. We are “basically evil.”

Who knows what you would have done if things had been different in your life, Kelly? Be thankful that you got this stuff out of your system when you were young. You see too many older people “having a mid-life” and TOTALLY wrecking their lives. Yes, you have regrets, as do we all, but you haven’t wrecked your life.

You seem like a hard-headed individual, Kelly, and now you are using it for the Lord.

However, I concede that now, 20 years later, as things have gone further and further downhill in the schools, etc., to where they are not even safe any more, in areas of the country other than where I am blessed to live, I would certainly look into homeschooling seriously, since I now know that it can be “relaxed” and not a gung-ho clone of a regular public or private school.

Sorry this was such a book.

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am a single mother. I married a man who was and still is very much a man who follows the world. He left when my little girl was nine months old. It is nice to hear stories of God’s redeeming power at work in other peoples lives, and to see how he got you through it.

I still have a lot of challenges with my little girls father, and I often pray that a day will come when he will willing give up his rights to her so we can live in peace. I do know that God is a mighty God and that he loves my little girl and I.

Thank you again for sharing your story and giving a tired working mom a glimmer of hope.

Ashley
aka simplebeauty

PS My greatest desire is to “court” my Boaz who will become my husband and allow me to stay at home with my daughter and many more little darlings :O)

Your post touches so many because family dynamics arent always the “traditional” way anymore.

God’s grace is so amazing because he takes you as you are where you are and grows you, stretches you and increases you.

Thank you for such a candid and inspiring post. We have so much in common!

To be blessed so abundantly with an amazing marriage, many godly seed (though one has strayed and will come back)and a desire (that I believe God puts there) to serve Him with everything I am…how can it be that He loves me so??

I find myself asking “what did I do to deserve this”, I am reminded, it is GRACE, I did nothing to deserve it…Jesus did it all.

Amazed by His Grace,
Michelle
http://www.shelookethwell.blogspot.com