Miriam (from NSW, Australia, wife to Michael, mum to Alexander 2yrs)

I really want to get ahold of that Duggar book. =)

Also, we are trying to implement the Maxwell’s “Managers of Their Chores”

My dream is that once all of this wisdom is woven into our family life, I will start talking like a normal adult instead of constantly saying “Did you finish the dishes? Did you put up your clothes? Did you feed the dog? Did you? Did you? Did you?”

I second the Duggar book! It’s a quick, refreshing read (convicting without defeating).

Another book that I HIGHLY recommend is H. Clay Trumbull’s “Hints on Child Training.” If you’ve been around a bit, you’ve probably heard about or even read it. In case you haven’t, Trumbull was a Civil War Chaplain and father of eight. Apparently folks kept asking him for advice, which would eventually result in this book. Trumbull’s advice is clear, purposeful, and based on Biblical principles. Awesome read!

I don’t see it. Several have been having trouble commenting (I’ve even had one or two that didn’t post), so you may try again? I’ve researched and asked around what the problem could be, with no results so far

My biggest help, other than scripture, of course, has been the books I’ve read by Dr. Kevin Leman. Even his FOF interviews are extremely useful, I’ve found.

My most recent “success” was diverting what was quickly becoming a meal-time standoff. We enjoy cooking and eating, and the fellowship of the dinner table, but I was noticing there were fewer pleases and thank you’s happening, and even a few “I don’t like ________ (name that dish)episodes, out of character for my bunch, and definitely unacceptable. I simply restated the rules of etiquette, tied to gratitude – no food will be served with out a please, no food will be eaten without a thank you – and outlined the punishment for expressing an ungrateful spirit by dissing the dinner – plate will be gone, child will be excused, child will go to bed immediately. This took exactly once – my son, bless his heart, who is actually the sweetest natured of the bunch, let go an “I don’t like” and that was it. He cried in his room for an hour, I cried in the kitchen right along with him, but that little problem is solved, and the effect reached all three kids. No nagging, no spanking (I’m not opposed at all to spanking BTW, it was just nice to not have to do it), no further discussion. Just done.

The other nice side effect is they seem to actually appreciate that I am willing to act in the best interest of all involved – the chef, the children, and the household as a whole. My oldest daughter, all of eight, commented that she wouldn’t want someone saying they didn’t like something she had prepared for them – yea, she get’s it!

That’s my best, most direct answer – the no-nag parent has an advantage, also, because there’s none of that nails on the black board, under your skin irritation that I think frazzles so many of us (me too, I’m just getting the hang of it).

All of this, and I do not have to say a word!

Maybe it would be useful to those reading this post?

http://ahouseholdforchrist.blogspot.com/