Comments on: I AM in Love

By: joyjoyunspeakable

joyjoyunspeakable — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 04:20:46 +0000

Hi all, as a young lady who is not married, I can tell you that I very much want my father involved in dating/courting/whatever you want to call it. I don’t feel micromanaged at all. In fact, I feel protected! I have been in a relationship with a young man & wanted the courtship, while he was used to dating. I don’t regret anything in our relationship, but know that God did not mean for us to marry, but rather to grow spiritually. A relationship is not a failure if it does not end up in marriage, if it brings the people involved closer to God. All that to say, I find this story a beautiful picture of how God romances us.

By: Lisa of Longbourn

Lisa of Longbourn — Sat, 26 Dec 2009 01:15:38 +0000

Any word on when the documentary is coming?

Thanks.
To God be all glory,
Lisa of Longbourn

By: wordwarrior

wordwarrior — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 14:44:10 +0000

Margaret,

Very well said–thank you.

By: Margaret

Margaret — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:36:52 +0000

Mrs W.
“I have a friend in a courtship relationship right now and it is all a pretense because she wants to be married so bad that she will marry the wrong one just to do it. I mean, they don’t agree on ANYTHING. But they both give the right answers to her dad so that they can stay together.”

Your friend is not courting. She is lying. How can you blame the courtship model or her parents for what she is doing?
It is no different than a more typical American girl picking a bad guy and insisting on marrying him, even knowing he’s a drunk, violent, irresponsible pig, but she loooooves him and wants to be married.

Courtship is not the problem in the example you gave. It’s deception that is the problem. I feel sorry for her parents who are going to be watching the aftermath of her very bad decision with broken hearts. And of course they will be blamed, and probably God will be blamed, and she will be a “victim of a wicked horrible no-good partiarchy”.

By: Margaret

Margaret — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:29:15 +0000

hmmm…I am friends with a church group in which courtship is their standard. My friends are *happyhappyhappy* with their husbands and their many babies. My closest friend did not so much as hold hands with her husband until after they’d been pronounced man and wife. They did not go out alone, and when they were getting to know each other, they were in a room alone, but with the doors wide open. There is no reason for a couple to hide away from the world unless they’re wanting to do or say something they’d be ashamed for others to see. And you will never meet a more quiet, deep, abiding, joyful love than they have.

The problem is not that courtship jams two strangers together and tells them to just make it work. That problem may happen with particular families. But then, is it really courting? I think there are many styles of courtship that differ from family to family. Yes, we can get in trouble with being legalistic.

But I know for sure that my children can’t “get in trouble” by avoiding things like early dating, running around with the opposite gender, having little accountability, having hearts broken again and again, experiencing kissing (or more) with multiple people, etc. I know for sure that the “Bible’s way” mandates maturity, purity, accountability, respect for parents and their guidance, and values dedication and committment over mushy “feeeelings”. Looks like courtship to me, though perhaps people would do those same things and call it “dating”.

By: Lori

Lori — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:10:43 +0000

Mrs W – “It’s something we’ve made up”

If a person made it up, I’d like to nominate him/her for a Nobel Peace prize.

By: wordwarrior

wordwarrior — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:10:30 +0000

Mrs. W.,

You continue to amaze me with your reckless comments, lol! Please refrain from further discussion if you can’t dialogue without bitterness and making unruly accusations against those seeking to honor the Lord. It’s just not pleasant.

You may be surprised what the Bible says. Refer to the comment I just left Teresa, and see which “model” best fits the biblical insight we are given….

By: Word Warrior

Word Warrior — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:06:07 +0000

Teresa,

One comment you made was a bit disturbing to me (assuming you are a Christian):

“But I am forced to admit that the idea of the girl as a “precious gift” to be bestowed upon the man from father to husband doesn’t sit well with me.”

Marriage is, for Christians, supposed to be the picture of Christ and his bride, the church. If we didn’t look anywhere else in Scripture for how we are to handle marriage, this one picture is enough to dispel the comment you made…

“I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.” 2 Corinthians 11:2

It is indeed a father’s role to “present a spotless bride” to her husband. The model was explicit in the OT, and continues right through the NT with an even more vivid picture. When fathers fail to protect their “spotless brides” we mar the very picture of Christ and His church.

It has nothing to do with 1800…it goes back much farther

By: Word Warrior

Word Warrior — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:01:09 +0000

I hope I do not come across disprectiful to those who disagree; I am very passionate about this topic so my words can be stronger than I mean them to be sometimes

By: Mrs W

Mrs W — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 12:46:57 +0000

Mrs Kelly, if it is right it is going to work. There is nowhere in the Bible that tells us that God’s way is courtship. It’s something we’ve made up so we don’t have to let our adult children be intelligent and responsible adults.