On “Mothering Forgiveness”

Mothering Forgiveness

While we’re on the subject of reflecting Christ to our children, and often failing at that, I pulled this post from the archives to encourage…

“There are deeply stabbing lessons of motherhood….

This one hit me in a split second.  In one instance I refused the apology. Not completely refused, but a “I’m still very upset with you and you apologize for the same thing over and over and over, and I just want to see change instead of another apol—“

Heart sank….I was spouting the very words I hoped I would never hear my Father say.  And I feel sure I will not.

Stopped mid-sentence, tears streaming down both our faces.

“No…

I’m so sorry.  I beg God to forgive me for the same things over and over and–by His grace–I will continue to forgive you over and over as long as I live.”

Relief broke across the face…relief that could only come after such a terrifying thought that Mother had “met her forgiveness quota.”

Perhaps you are encouraged.”

(Need practical help and encouragement as a mom? When Motherhood Feels Too Hard–the book that will change the way you parent.)

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13 Responses to “On “Mothering Forgiveness””

  1. I have done the same myself. I thank God that I have Jesus everyday. I cannot imagine what my life would be without Him.

  2. Linnie Lues says:

    Oh, thank you so much, Kelly. You encouraged me! I struggle so many times with excepting apologies, but also in asking my children/husband’s forgiveness, for the same thing over and over again.
    Thank you!

  3. Jordin says:

    Thank you. I needed this, as I said almost the exact same words to someone I love yesterday. Now, off to ask forgiveness for myself (for the thousandth time) and apologize.

  4. More than encouraged – convicted.

    Thank You.

  5. Keri Hurley says:

    Ouch!! I am convinced that one of the things that tears apart families..is Lack of Forgiveness. I just had an evening where I just didn’t want to forgive a grown kid..something simple but repeated and I feel–am a crummy mom.So, as soon as he gets home from work..I will be asking for forgiveness.Thought I had this down..ha!Our family learned some hard..but much needed lessons five years ago after leaving a church. Feelings were hurt terribly..family members were hurt deeply and I am convinced by the Grace of God that he showed us how to forgive each other and put away Anger. The Anger thing is a Huge One! Anger and Unforgiveness will send your kids out the door fast!! So thanks for the post Kelly..Thankful that we have a Savior who Always forgives us!!

  6. Sarah Coller says:

    Convicted…with chills. Thank you. 🙂

  7. 6 arrows says:

    Wow, what a powerful post! It shows me how it IS possible to stop mid-sentence and apologize and ask forgiveness. I needed that so much…I have a very strong tendency, once I start in on someone, to just let it all out, even when I can see the other person’s reaction to my words/tone.

    I grew up in a home where nobody, that I recall, ever apologized to anyone, much less asked for forgiveness. Yet I can’t use that as an excuse for my own failure to do the right thing now as an adult. And, if anything, it should teach me the importance of modeling correct responses in challenging situations, so my children can have a Godly example of what to DO, instead of a picture of what NOT to do that they must struggle to overcome.

    Thank you so much for your transparency, Kelly. You are a blessing to this reader! (((HUGS)))

  8. CL says:

    Wow. I am in emotional state today and this hit me on the chest. Excellent.

  9. Kelly L says:

    At least you caught yourself mid-sentence. I had to re-train what I told my daughter. “If you really are sorry you’ll never do it again.”
    She repeated it back to me one day as she was heartbroken that she must not have been sorry the last time.
    I got Mom of the year for that one. Praise God that He has taken me far away from that horrible place!

    Great reminder to me to always remember to forgive and seek forgiveness!

  10. This literally brought tears to my eyes. I needed this so much today, Kelly. Thank you.

  11. I remember my now 20 yr old son saying to me once after he had apologized for something, “Mom, do you really forgive me? Cause you still seem mad.” I was so convicted…now I try to remember to always give a real hug and a big I Love You after an apology!

  12. Jennifer V. says:

    I know that this is an older post but today is the first time I have read it. I needed this today. I feel like I’ve had so many days lately where I cry before bed because I was an absolute beast to my sons that day. Luckily this post pierced my heart today and I was able to change the situation today before it was to late. I called my son over to me and asked for his forgiveness for yelling at him this morning and he hugged me and I could feel the tension drain from his little body. Thanks so much for this post.

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