Do You Need to “Mom-Up”? (A Strategy for Discouragement)

Do You Need to Mom UpSometimes I feel like a wimp as a mom. Especially a homeschooling mom. I go to bed at night thinking of all the things I should have done, and shouldn’t have done, and how the older I get, the less I feel like I know what I’m doing.

I get overwhelmed, thinking about the messes, the meals, the unanswered messages, the appointments, the discipline, that child’s struggle, and this one’s, taking care of details while never losing sight of the bigger, more important picture–we work overtime, in every way.

And from here I can go two ways:

I can cave in, have another pity party and give up on trying, saying something spiritual-sounding about how my children are better off with less of me, or I don’t have to try because Jesus loves me anyway and all is grace.

Or, I can do what I’ve been called to. I can mom-up, dig in, and strive to be a faithful mother, a hard-working and loving wife and a diligent homemaker. Sometimes I need to give myself a kick in the pants, stop letting my emotions lead me, and meditate on what I know is true and stay there until it becomes a reality.

And what is truth to me, to you, as we plod through the trenches of life? 

God is my Helper, my Strength, and He will sustain me. (Psalm 54:4)

I shall not be dismayed, for the Lord upholds me with His righteous hand. (Isaiah 41:10)

God is faithful and will not allow me to be tempted beyond my ability, but will provide a way of escape. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

This present suffering is nothing compared to the glory that will be revealed in us. (Romans 8:18)

Jesus knows my weakness, and empathizes with me, for He has felt it all too. (Hebrews 4:15)

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:13)

And I pull myself together, proclaiming these truths, spending more time in prayer and His Word, equipping myself to face the day’s battles, whatever it demands.

I fight for my children, their hearts, my marriage, our lives, because that’s what we’re here to do and it’s worth doing and the proverbial dying for.

Practical Action to Pull You Out of the Pit

Then I make a list of problem areas and I tackle them, one at a time. I organize what is chaos, and that brings more clarity and peace, and boosts my energy. I plan meals ahead of time so I’m not caught off guard with added stress. I address areas where I have been careless in my child-training and tackle those one at a time. I assess my health and make sure I’m functioning at optimal levels of energy.

I remember that living the Christian life has never been easy, but I have it far, far easier than those who are being persecuted around the world, who have been driven from their homes and are fighting to stay alive. Yes, that brings my “overwhelmed” into perspective quickly.

I get a handle on life because it’s mine, and I am responsible, and because I want to press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ, not for the praise of man, but to one day have my Savior look into my eyes and say, “well done, good and faithful servant.”

And then I reach out and grab a neighbor’s hand too, and cheer her on, or send a friend a “you can do it” note, because sometimes all we really need is to know we’re not alone and that somebody’s pulling for us.

Let’s Mom-up. Together. Tweet: Let’s Mom-up. Together. http://ctt.ec/14t8v+
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“Your book, When Motherhood Feels Too Hard, encouraged me more than anything I’ve ever read. I literally got up from reading it, feeling like a new person, with a new vision and strength for being a mom. Thank you so much.” -Erica B.

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20 Responses to “Do You Need to “Mom-Up”? (A Strategy for Discouragement)”

  1. Kelly, Thanks for this post. I identify with everything in here that you are saying. You have some of the same verses tucked away to meditate on in times of help as I have for such times. When I find myself feeling overwhelmed, I like to go to scripture and look at all it says about who God’s character. No matter where in scripture I pick up, I always walk away from that time with a better perspective and greater understanding of how His tender mercies for me in my time of distress.. Thanks for sharing.

  2. […] Sometimes I feel like a wimp as a mom. Especially a homeschooling mom. I go to bed at night thinking …read more       […]

  3. Thanks Kelly! I need a kick in the pants about once a week. Great post.

  4. Laura says:

    I needed to read this today. I cried myself to sleep last night because the discouragement was too much to bear. Thanks for sharing this.

  5. Shaye Strouse says:

    Thank you for the encouragement. It was very timely! 🙂

  6. Emily says:

    Oh thank you Kelly! I needed to read this today. Especially what you said about letting our emotions lead us. I printed off the scriptures you used and posted them above my sink. Time to mom-up!!

  7. 6 arrows says:

    Excellent post and scriptures, Kelly! I love that “mom-up” idea. 🙂

  8. Christina says:

    This is exactly what I needed to hear today. Sometimes the discouragement is overwhelming and I give into despair. But not today! I claim hope and joy and peace in Jesus’ name! Blessings to you and your family!

  9. Elizabeth says:

    After a day like yesterday (and I only have one compared to your 10!!), I definitely needed to read this! Thank you for this admonishment and encouragement!

  10. Jen in TX says:

    While I sat bawling this morning from feeling like an utter failure as a wife, mom of 7 and homeschooler, I checked my email and read this article. There are a lot of things that are completely out of my control like living in 1200 sq ft and most of my children not even having closets, but why does my child say “d-d-double-u” for “w-w-wagon? and my other one just stare off into space when she is 2 years behind in her school work? The organizing and meal planning simply cannot happen and by the sovereignty of God it is so. But Paul exhorts us to press on. I know it. I pray the Lord will bless my efforts even though I simply cannot ever get on top of things. He knows it, He allows it. I know the truth is that it is somehow working out for our good. I just don’t “feel” it. I know. LIFE IS NOW! We aren’t promised tomorrow. Rejoice always. I will finish my cry and press on another day thanking Him for another day to do the work He puts before me and thank Him for what we DO have rather than pine for what we don’t. Thanks for being real, Kelly.

  11. Sheila Mom to Seven says:

    A thousand times thank you! I’ve been feeling pretty “pitiful” lately. 😉

  12. Claudia says:

    Thank you, Kelly, for being the iron we need! And really, if we don’t “mom up” WHO will?! Our role matters. Really matters. I try to remember the little boy and his bread and fish. The Lord delights in multiplying whatever we are able to bring to each day.

  13. Amber says:

    Thank you! I’ve been really thinking about this lately, and ruminating on “Seek ye first the kingdom of God…”. It just strikes me how often I try to tackle certain things, to understand my role as a wife, mother, friend, etc… and I have to stop and ask myself, “Am I first seeking God?” He gives us the recipe right there in that verse, and here I wonder why things just don’t fall into place sometimes :).

  14. […] albeit a very looooong one, but it will pass, and the only thing for us to do right now is “mom-up” and do the very best we can, cushioning our days with prayer and communion with our Heavenly […]

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