Homeschooling: Teaching English Simply

(Updated and revised)

“Do not underestimate the importance of all the conversations (slow and clear conversations) that a mother has throughout the day with her child.  If Mother speaks clearly and decisively, she is giving the child valuable language lessons.  All the reading aloud she enjoys doing every day–as her children listen attentively–is doing verbal wonders, naturally, to teach English.  I trusted Charlotte and did not teach grammar directly until each young student reached the age of ten.  Each always did well on the language section of the year-end test…most children just need practice in hearing and speaking the English language (not television language) to get accustomed to the basic “right and wrong” of grammar.”

From Charlotte Mason Companion

I can testify to this truth as a former high school English teacher.  When children have a good grasp of the way language “sounds”, simply from partaking in good, consistent conversation, the nuts and bolts of grammar come more easily and can be postponed until children have a better understanding of abstract concepts.

By the way, when I entered my first year teaching high school students, I was prepared to only review grammar and focus on literature.  To my surprise, most of the class–about 85%, didn’t even have a basic grasp of grammatical structure and could not pick out the basic parts of speech.  Which may have been OK if they could construct a good sentence, but alas, they could not.  So don’t worry so much about “being behind the average school child”

Giving attention to our conversations lets us find ways to introduce new words and ideas in a very natural, but “sticky” way (meaning, it is more likely “to stick”). Look for conversation starters. Often, it comes from a child’s question, usually in abundance throughout the day.

A book can easily spark further conversation and I especially encourage you to ask a child to “narrate”, as Charlotte Mason called it, or “tell back”, in their own words, what they remember from the story.

(Don’t forget to utilize your time in the car or waiting for an appointment for rich conversation.)

In our increasingly electronic age where people spend less and less time interacting face to face, let us not neglect this very basic and needful exercise in teaching our children to be effective communicators!

“Too often home educators try to set up a government school at home. How foolish I was with all my records, charts, tests, and clip boards at the start! Students should read well, write well, be numerate, and cultured.”

John Mark Reynolds

Homeschooling on Accident? Don’t Fret the Interrupted Day

I had had one of those mornings….

slow getting awake because the baby had woke several times during the night…

too many morning phone calls (I miss my caller ID!)…

spills and boo-boos galore….

a day where my “neat and tidy” routine gets ambushed a thousand ways.

Once upon a time this kind of day would make me question my whole existence as a homeschooling mother. These kinds of days have pushed many homeschoolers back into the conventional classroom.

But I have learned to stop…look closer….think…

Education is not a set of memorized facts, though facts may be a part of education.

Education is not boxed up in a classroom.

Education is whole, diverse and happens all the time.

Education is part academic and part life experience; the life part is equally important, if not more, according to Scripture. An interruption in our academic schedule does not stop our education.

My older children still did their “school work”–reading, math, grammar, etc., making good use of some travel time.

But they also learned flexibility in dealing with unexpected events in the day. They learned some background history as we listened to a Mozart CD and read the fabulous, accompanying insert about his life. (Have you seen The Classical Composers?)

They learned that my favorite thing to do in the morning is snuggle them tightly, whispering how thankful I am for the gift of their lives.

They learned to quadruple a recipe we made to take to our volunteers at the job site.

They learned patience, tying a sister’s little shoe and helping her sound out her letters.

One that I whisked away with me on a quick errand learned how the huge conveyor belt coming down the mountain near the local cement plant brings rocks from the quarry–and why we hear dynamite blasts ever so often.

She also heard Dave Ramsey’s advice to a caller and asked me, “why does he hate credit cards?” “Well, let me explain…”

My son drank in the mechanics of my father’s newly-purchased saw mill (we’re cutting our wood for our houses from all the downed trees from the storm) when we visited the site for lunch.

One picture from our read-aloud-story sparked a 10-minute explanation about beavers.

And the thank you notes written to a friend afforded a spelling lesson or two. But more than that, it caused us to pause and let gratitude wash over our busy minds.

They learned that we fall to our knees in tears and beg our Heavenly Father to intercede on behalf of our dear friend who collapsed with brain bleeding at 24-weeks pregnant.

Education happens. An interrupted schedule isn’t cause to fret; the flexibility homeschooling provides gives me cause to rejoice as I look for ways to teach my children *wholly* among the imperfections of our day.

May God grant us eyes to see.

“God’s Curriculum”…If You Don’t Teach Them Anything Else!

When I heard Kevin Swanson say, “God has given us a curriculum…it’s Proverbs”, my spirit resonated with that seemingly simplistic statement. That doesn’t mean we need to toss our math and grammar books, it means if we are teaching math and grammar without a thorough teaching of the Proverbs, we are not giving them the tools they need to be truly successful.

That’s because Proverbs is the book of wisdom–the “secret” to life and whether our children will do well at what they put their hand to or not. “Wisdom! Get wisdom!” the Proverbs screams. Why would we clamor to get our academic ducks in a row but neglect this principal thing?

Swanson has made it easy to teach through the book of wisdom with his 3-book series, the Proverbs Study Guide.

Our family uses this in our devotion time, but it could easily be implemented during school as well. I love the simple, short yet thorough explanations Kevin gives of each verse of Proverbs. He ends the lesson with questions for discussion, as important as the lesson itself.

Containing everything from how to handle finances to political and social ethics, we simply cannot neglect to teach our children these most essential life lessons from the Word of God.

The Book of Proverbs Study Series comes highly recommended from this family!

Busy Moms “Get Real” Series, Part 5: “I Can’t Get it All Done!”

“Remember the principle of gardening: a lot of sweat and tears are required before the reward of harvest. It’s the same with mothering.”

A reader sent me an email that is not unlike many that I receive, so I decided to include an excerpt and answer it here in a post. I know we all struggle with many of the same things, so I hope to encourage you “in the trenches” (And, dear friend who sent the letter, I replied to you but the email delivery failed. I hope you don’t mind my posting your question here, the only way I could answer it, without your name, changing a few details for anonymity’s sake.)

A mother writes:

“I have 6 children – 3 who are homeschooled and 3 little ones (1 of those we do some preschool type things with, but not alot). Here is the problem I have: I can’t seem to get it done. We start school and generally just do the basics and school goes on all day long. There are lots of starts and stops to my time with the small children, but it is draining to continue on with school that long. Then, with school lasting so long, I struggle with the household chores. I’ve become very disorganized because I just don’t have the time. It hasn’t always been like this, but I am failing somewhere and I’m looking for some/any guidance. It has become overwhelming and while we want to continue homeschooling I am ready to give up.

Maybe it just comes down to too high of expectations on my part….I really feel like a failure.”

Dear Mother,

You are NOT a failure. It is important to remember that our enemy wants you to believe that. He wants you to give up, to be overwhelmed, he wants to destroy your optimism and ultimately your family. But here’s the good news: “Greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world”.

AND…we have to keep revisiting our long-term vision….keep perspective. The academic advantage is only one reason why we homeschool. Imparting our family’s values and worldviews, tying bonds of fellowship, nurturing relationships, building character–there are a myriad of other reasons that should encourage us to dig our heels in. That’s our starting point. Now take a deep breath, and let’s get practical…

Almost everything I would tell you involves “simplifying”. Everyone’s life is unique and varied; but most of us could stand to simplify.

Stuff.

The more I live the more I believe this one thing is slipping from our hands as Americans, but is vital to our “success” as families. We MUST be deliberate about simplifying our lives in every way possible. Less is almost always more. The more we own, the more we do, the more we owe, the less we have left to give each other, to invest in our relationships and practical, important things like sitting around the table at night enjoying a meal together. Take inventory and look hard. Pare down, starting with clothes in your closet. Clean out drawers, under beds, pots and pans, dishes, cabinets–with every thing you purge, the lighter you will feel. Take a weekend or two and get the whole family involved. It’s much better to enjoy owning fewer things you really love than owning a passel of so-so things that demand your precious time to keep them, organize them, clean them and maintain them.

Activities.

If you’ve read my blog long, I’ll sound like a broken record. Busy moms can’t be all they need to be with too many extras. The same simplicity principle applies here. A few activities can enrich your life. Too many will suck it out of you.

Meals

Meals can become much less stressful with a little planning and forethought. The crock pot is your best friend. Find some great recipes (there are a gazillion crock pot recipe sites) and get supper started in the morning. Making double batches of meals and freezing one for a busy night is another great way to give yourself some relief. It takes virtually the same amount of time and cleaning as one meal.

Household chores

• Get as much off counter tops/tables, etc. as possible–it will be easier to clean surfaces.
• Designate “clutter patrol” about twice a day…get everyone to do a quick pick up. Very little ones can help a lot with this and even think it’s fun.
• Keep a “give it away” bag handy to toss things. As soon as it is full, put it in the car to drop off.
• Consider designating one day for thorough cleaning. We do this on Fridays because moods are more cheerful since it is “movie night”. I also only require reading on Fridays and let them off from textbook work (we “school” year ’round). This is also the night we try to have people over-extra motivation for the cleaning.
• Spray sinks and toilets with a bleach/water combination for a quick, clean feeling
• Train your children to avoid putting clean clothes into the laundry hamper. Clothes can usually be worn several days before washing, especially during the winter.
• Encourage everyone (and model it yourself) to keep clutter at bay by carrying at least one object “closer” to its destination each time you go to a different room.
• Keep baskets to catch clutter. Baskets in the living room can catch quickly-tossed toys; baskets at the entrance can hold shoes; keep baskets handy for those items that seem to be used a lot but make a mess and need to stay close.

Homeschooling

Before we even address strategies, make sure basic obedience/character issues are being addressed. If there are problems with bad attitudes or disrespect toward Mom, the school routine needs to be laid aside until these foundational problems are solved.

After that, the”secret”, I think, is laying aside pressures and expectations, honing in on YOUR family’s definition and goals for education, and working from there. Relax. Multiple research findings conclude that a “good education” is encapsulated into “being literate, numerate, and having the ability to reason”. This does not require hours of formal instruction, but rather a casual lifestyle that facilitates a constant thirst for knowledge. Good conversation with parents in tune to asking questions and probing their children to think is more than most students get in an average day.

The importance of providing enough space for creative exploration, problem-solving and hands-on learning cannot be underestimated. Small chunks of instruction–a 15-minute lesson on the concept of multiplying, telling time or a brief overview of how weather works can be far more beneficial than two hours worth of worksheets.

“Teaching” is going on all the time. Don’t become a slave to a textbook or curriculum; use them as tools, not tyrants. (I have taught 5 children to read by phonics with no formal curriculum.) Bath time, driving time, walking together, day or night–all hours of the day provide opportunities for teaching, especially teaching little ones. As they get older, self-directed study becomes more natural because their appetites for learning have been whetted.

There is much, much more on this philosophy in my ebook, Think Outside the Classroom.

Extra tips for “finding” more time:

• Don’t answer the telephone before noon. This has potential to revolutionize your life.
• Multi-task. Have a child do some of his reading to you while you feed the baby or give a bath; meal plan in the car; read to the children during breakfast or lunch…etc.
• Dictate a grocery list to a child while you drive (added spelling lesson bonus).
• Remember to delegate chores; taking the extra time to teach little ones to help keep order is well worth it. A two year old can be expected to put his dirty clothes in the hamper, put shoes where they go, pick up toys and other similar chores with occasional reminders.

Some overwhelmed moms may need a “mommy helper”. In a day where grandmothers, aunts and sisters aren’t as readily available (or willing) to help a young mother, she should not feel ashamed if she needs an extra pair of hands. If you don’t have a community of support, you may consider hiring someone to help with basic chores, running errands, etc.

More than anything, keep it in perspective. Even the busiest, most exhausting days are fleeting. Keep a clean home but don’t obsess if it isn’t like you would prefer. Teach your children to be orderly but remember they are children. Enjoy them, capitalize on the wonders of the curious years, and find as many ways as you can to simply enjoy life where you are and the children in it. Remember the principle of gardening: a lot of sweat and tears are required before the reward of harvest. It’s the same with mothering.

(And don’t forget to run barefoot in the sunshine every now and then )

Part 1:  Margins

Part 2:  Housework Again?

Part 3:  When Technology Hurts

Part 4:  Children Are More Than an Organizational Problem

Operation Conversation: Missing Ingredient to a Great Education

Math book-check. Grammar-check. Science experiment-check. We’ve spent the time and money to research the “best” curriculum. We’ve been inspired by our homeschool conference and we’re ready to tackle the “best school year” ever.

If you are that mom, let me remind you of one important educational tool that is so easy to miss: CONVERSATION.

Conversation is the “skeleton” onto which an education can grow flesh. It’s where the rote information comes alive. Without it, much of our efforts are wasted.

From the time our children are little, our conversations teach them. (The question, “when does she start school” really reveals our misunderstanding about education. If “school” is learning, they never start or stop.) This is why I think it’s so crucial that toddlers grow up in homes where attention can be given to their early, natural development through conversation.

Children are not only learning a language from birth, but they are gaining insight into the world around them and we can greatly facilitate this education with a little careful attention.

Often, and I am guilty, we let our little one’s curiosity disturb us and we squelch important opportunities rather than embrace them. A child who is curious about what is in front of him will be more likely to retain the information you give him in that moment than if he is just asked to read about it at a time when his curiosity isn’t piqued.

I challenge you, as I challenge myself, to be more deliberate about our conversations.

• Answer in detail–As best you can, answer your children’s questions with details, looking for learning opportunities in the simplest of questions. If necessary, tell them you don’t know the answer and invite them to help you look it up.

• Expand their vocabulary–“Mom, this flower is pretty.” “Yes, it is….it’s remarkable. I love the colors…they’re so bright and vibrant! Do you know what ‘vibrant’ means? It’s just another word for ‘bright’.”

• Reinforce their learning/reading. Charlotte Mason emphasized the importance of “narration”, a retelling of an event or something the child read. Having a child repeat things back to you is a powerful tool for solidifying what he has read, seen or experienced. It also opens the doors for further discussion.

• Ask questions. A most important part of education is teaching a child to think, observe and analyze. This is best done through questioning in conversation. From the time they are little through adulthood, get your children in the habit of being able to answer “why” or “how”. I like to ask them, “What do you think about that?”

Of course, don’t miss the best part…conversation draws us closer together. In a society where electronic gadgets have drawn our faces and minds away from each other, let’s be so vigilant to guard this area and preserve the relationship-building conversation that used to be the most essential family experience!

For more about a “lifestyle of learning”, I recommend my ebook, “Think Outside the Classroom: A Practical Approach to Relaxed Homeschooling”.

Giveaway to a GREAT Homeschooling Preschoolers Ebook!

Last year I contributed a chapter to an ebook by Kendra Fletcher entitled “Preschool at Home Where They Belong”. The book is finished and ready for sale! And let me just say, though I’m not quite done reading it, what an inspiration! There are sixteen contributing authors with fifteen ROBUST chapters of encouragement and practical application for the Mom of preschoolers. This is a no-fluff book you’ll refer to again and again!

Kendra has graciously offered to give away 3 copies! I’ll simply select 3 random winners from the comment section below. As usual, leave a comment and get an extra chance for leaving a separate, additional comment for any of the following: 1. Share this post on Facebook using the Facebook button below the post, 2. Blog about the giveaway with a link back to this post, Tweet this post using the Twitter button. Contest ends Monday (Aug. 15) at midnight.

I think “Preschool at Home…” will be greatly encouraging to moms of preschoolers, so be sure to tell any moms you think need some inspiration!

Excerpt:

“Plan play activities around your children‘s interests. My son loved cars. Our hot rods would race on the car mat. I was careful to not limit communication to squealing tires. I‘d use vocabulary words, like ―engine‖ or―mechanic,” to improve his understanding of cars. Vocabulary is one predictor of reading success. Children with rich vocabularies have larger mental word banks to draw from when decoding and a keener sensitivity to how words mingle in sentences. Don‘t let your preschooler vocalize with grunts and screeches. If your child wants a toy, prompt them to speak, even if it‘s the beginning sound.” Randy Saller from the chapter, “Beginning Well: The Special Needs Preschooler and the Importance of Play”