Category: motherhood

Women, Work & Freedom: One Big, Fat, Suicidal Error

Nicholas Farrell nailed it in his piece, Women, Work & Freedom, exposing the truths that most of us are too afraid to say out loud, regardless of the damage we’ve all suffered from ignoring it.

“Women in Europe and America have made one great big fat suicidal error as a result of modern feminism since the movement’s inception: They have confused work with freedom. This confusion has had catastrophic consequences for all of us because it has fatally infected the core activity of any healthy civilization: the creation and upbringing of children….

The truth is the precise opposite….Nearly all work, if we mean the work that most people in the West do day after day in exchange for money, is a life sentence in prison. It is dull, repetitive, and soul-destroying. It does not liberate.” -Nicholas Farrell

I have always puzzled at the claim of “freedom” in the demand of women to work outside the home when it is apparent they haven’t been liberated from anything, but rather had a burden added to their already intensive, full-time job. Not liberation, but stress, anxiety and exhaustion seems to be what women really fought for and won.

I have said before, I’m not trying to be oppressive by saying that women should focus on their roles at home instead of clamoring to get out; I’m trying to illumine the truly liberating life that so many have forsaken for a false promise. (That’s a nice thing, right? And every time I still get harassed for it…go figure.)

And yes, bringing up children had to be villainized, on some level, before feminists could convince the masses of women that they were somehow being short-changed. They were too…distracted, maybe? to realize, as Farrell said, that the secret to a “healthy civilization” is having children and investing, full time, in their upbringing. And, the results are in. We’re splitting at the seams and no one seems to make the connection.

And then there’s this–oh how did we miss this:

“If women stopped work tomorrow it would solve the West’s chronic unemployment crisis overnight. Due to the dire shortage of workers left, salaries would rocket.”

The “can’t afford it” argument? Sometimes that’s true (although usually not), but we created that monster too. If one-income families were the norm, the income would rise to meet it. It’s just so simple: women have an incredibly important role to play (THE most important, perhaps?) and men are sufficiently ready to take care of us and do the grunt work of providing an income. We all have a wonderful, specific cog in this wheel that makes the world go ’round, one just as important as the other. But it takes us all, content with our cogs, to keep the wheel turning.

Read the rest of Women, Work & Freedom

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ABC’s of Motherhood (For You, on Mother’s Day)

Assume the best about your children; they are still learning, growing and they need you to believe in them.

Be available. There are so many distractions. Fight them. It’s one of the most important things a mother can do.

Call them fun nicknames.

Devote yourself to imparting wisdom to your children.

Exhale deeply. It’s only spilled milk.

Firmly draw lines.

Gently enforce them.

Help them do the most important thing in life: seek God and the infinite wisdom found in Him. It will CHANGE the course of their lives….every aspect.

Include them in what you do. It is the best way to teach and to make them feel valued.

Just relax. What seems like a big deal today won’t be tomorrow. Maintain perspective.

Keep the vision. You’re raising men and women and your influence on them will be over soon.

Let them experiment, explore and do things on their own. That’s the best education you can give them.

Model for them (by God’s grace) the attitudes, responses, habits and kindness you want them to have.

Never fail to repent when you have sinned.

Object to activities, reading material, movies/tv or any other forms of media and entertainment that do not line up with Philippians 4:8…no matter what their friends are doing.

Passionately love them.

Quit worrying about keeping up with others’ expectations. You are the mom to these children; God has given you a unique gift to raise them.

Remind your children constantly that their purpose in life is to use all their gifts, talents, strengths and passions to glorify their Creator.

Search out their interests; then give them the freedom and tools to explore them. This is where children best thrive.

Tell stories. Stories about your childhood, make-believe stories, educational stories. It’s a gift to their imaginations.

Use your time wisely. Say “no” to things that do not help your family grow and meet your life-long goals.

Voraciously read to them.

Walk with your children, listening, answering and smiling. Point out the birds, the clover, the sounds around you. Let them see you in awe at the beauty and creation of God.

X-pect them to be polite, courteous and kind. When they’re not, point it out, and replace it with an appropriate response.

Yesterday is over, with its mistakes. Purpose to fill today with joy. Your children will never forget it. It’s the little things in a day that will imprint on their memories.

Zealously bring your children before the throne of God, reminding yourself that they belong to Him.

(Another oldie but goodie…Dandelions & Mothers)

The Real Reason I Have So Many Children

 

It does happen. About my 8th month of pregnancy, when ligament pains have me doubled over or I realize what a chore it is to walk to the bathroom. And then again, right after the baby is born, and I feel so LIGHT, and I can walk, and the birds are singing and the sun is shining and I’m ready to get back into shape and feel normal.

The thought comes….”I don’t know if I want to do this again. I’ve put my motherhood time in, right? I mean I have a house full already! It wouldn’t be wrong to just…stop, would it?”

It may not be. I don’t know the answer to that question. But I do know the answer that comes back to me every time:

“God is intricately working out the details of our lives, governing every step, hand-crafting every life. And this life is about glorifying Him. And…there’s more to this life, to my life. The lives He gives me are eternal.  And, I don’t “choose to have babies.” No one can. I can only choose not to. Do I want to be the clay in the Potter’s hand, and see what He has in mind for His final masterpiece? Or do I want to sling myself off the wheel because I’m a little dizzy just now?”

That’s the answer I get; what He says to ME. That I CAN technically stop my next child from being born, and that may be OK. Or it may not be…I don’t think it’s always black and white. I do know that “it is He who has made us, and not we ourselves”. That pregnancy isn’t like sickness, something I think we are freely allowed to try to avert. That people are all that matter to Him compared to things and jobs and vacations…and even my temporary comfort.

But what if that one that I didn’t accept–what if he or she had a particularly crucial role in the life of another? (And don’t we all?) What if he or she would give birth to someone who had a critical role in the life of another?

It starts to sound like a fun premise for a science-fiction movie; one little move in history changes everything. But couldn’t it?

Are you the child of a woman who was the child of a fifth-born? Changed your life. Well, brought it into its very existence. It blows my mind. And THAT is why I don’t want to hinder what belongs to the Lord. Many things He gives me to choose; but I don’t feel qualified in the life-department. It’s just feels too big for me.

Does it make you think?

Jonathan Edwards–5th of eleven children

Benjamin Franklin–8th of 10 children

Napoleon Bonaparte–4th of 10 children

George Washington–5th of 10 children

John Wesley–15th of 19 children (Susanna, mother, 25th child)

Johann Sebastian Bach–8th of 8

Sylvanus Crosby (grandfather of Fanny Crosby)–19th of 19

Celine Dion–14th of 14 children

 

Making Life Easier: Chores and Homeschool Help is Here!

As I march in the struggle every mother has to get organized, stay organized and run a more orderly home, I am so excited to be implementing two new things, from The Ultimate Homemaking Ebook Bundle to help me!

I’ve recently realized, as we’ve virtually been rebuilding and putting our lives back together after the tornado in 2011, that I need to regroup and become more intentional, especially with my little ones, about imprinting God’s word and His wisdom on their hearts each day. So these have come at a perfect time!

$5.00

Write Through the Bible, by Trisha @ Intoxicated on Life, is a printable download of copywork sheets of memory verses. I love this for several reasons. First, we are huge fans of copy work, a simple practice that Charlotte Mason hailed as a fundamental teaching tool.

“When a child copies a passage, he has to copy letters, words and punctuation. And in order to copy it correctly, he has to really see it. This is a seeing that impresses the information on the child’s brain.” -C. M.

These sheets are done for me, with lined spaces and Scripture verses, which we favor for copy work, but it can be hard for a little one to copy the tiny words from a Bible. Problem solved! The kids love these so much more than just writing in their notebooks. (There’s a cursive and print version.)
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$17.99

Easy Peasy Chore Charts by Alina Joy @ The Good Old Days Farm

Finally, simple help with chore time! Such a brilliant idea!

A customizable, printable system that easily adjusts to every family, this chore chart system makes helping children remember and follow through with their chores easy peasy!

I’m still printing these off and getting my system set up and I’m just giddy thinking about it!

 

And this!!! The ABC’s For Godly Children Curriculum, by Lindsey at Road to 31–a fabulous resource for moms of young ones who want to intentionally turn their hearts toward God’s Word. I’m printing and laminating these to use over and over. One of my older ones can recite it with the younger ones and everyone benefits from some important Scripture memory.

“The ABC’s For Godly Children is a comprehensive, Bible eCurriculum centered around teaching children ages 4-10 about the God they serve and how to have a heart like His.

By using each letter of the alphabet a Bible lesson is presented in an understandable and interactive format to teach core truths concerning the Gospel, Godly Character, and Biblical Manhood and Womanhood. Your children will learn their ABC’s and a necessary Biblical foundation as they connect them through Scripture memorization, detailed lessons, simple crafts, and interactive song.”

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Notice that the purchase of these three fabulous resources totals $30.99. Worth every penny. BUT, if you buy The Ultimate Homemaking Ebook Bundle you get these two PLUS 95 more incredible ebooks, PLUS $140 in bonus gifts for just $29.97.

That, friend, is a no-brainer ;-) . Don’t forget to tell your friends, who may be struggling in different areas, about this amazing deal (or you could surprise her with it!)

97 of the Best Homemaking Tools on the Net for .31 Each??!!

 

 

 

$640 worth of fabulous homemaking resources for only $29.97???

That is NOT a typo.

 

 

More than 75 widely-known bloggers and authors in the homemaking sphere have joined together to offer 97 of their most popular eBooks and eCourses, valued at just over $600, for the incredibly low price of $29.97!

More than anything, our goal for this sale was for it to be, well… ultimate! We firmly believe that you will not find a more comprehensive collection of homemaking resources anywhere on the web, and particularly not in this price range. For this low price, you gain access to every single one of these resources, so that you can customize your own collection to contain exactly the ones you want and know you’ll use.

PLUS FREE GIFTS!

To sweeten the pot, we’ve also teamed up with 10 companies to bring you over $140 in bonus offers, giving you an affordable opportunity to get products you’ll use and love for only the cost of shipping, or in some cases, entirely for free! (It’s more than worth it JUST FOR THESE GIFTS!)

Another perk: Buy a bundle from this page and you’ll be entered to win a free, hard copy of my book, When Motherhood Feels Too Hard and a copy of our Scripture Songs CD!

What customers who bought this are saying:

“I got this yesterday, got all of our books downloaded, and printed the first part of 1+1+1=1′s kindergarten curriculum. I am so excited to bring it into our homeschool day today. It’s so simple to implement I could get it ready last night and be prepared this morning to share it with the kids. My younger son is going to love it. It was worth the price of the bundle just by itself. Goodness, just having the homeschool section was worth more than the $29.27 price.” -Kari

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What’s Included in the Sale?

When you purchase The Ultimate Homemaking eBook collection, you will get instant access to any of the 97 eBooks and eCourses listed below.

PLUS over $140 of FREE Bonuses

Each The Ultimate Homemaking eBook collection comes with more than $140 of FREE Bonuses from 10 companies that we know you’ll love. More on these bonuses below.

Please note: This collection is only available from 9 a.m. EST on April 29th to 11:59 p.m. EST on May 4th. There will be no late sales offered.

Home & Property {Cleaning, Organizing, Decor}

Educational Children’s Resources

Budgeting {Finance & Time}

In the Kitchen {Recipes and Cooking}

Pregnancy & Baby Care

Holidays & Special Events

Spiritual Growth

Marriage & Romance

Motherhood

Health & Fitness

Beauty

Working from Home & Blogging

Ecourses

    PLUS, You will receive FREE Bonuses from these companies…

    A FREE Two-Month Membership to Fit2B Studio, where their wholesome workouts for the whole family are tummy safe and particularly target Diastasis Recti (split abs). ($19.98 value. No shipping restrictions.)

     

    A $15 store credit to TruKid. With products like their aware-winning sun care, they are dedicated to providing all natural skin and hair care for kids, babies, and now pets. ($15.00 value. Standard shipping applies. International shipping available.)

     

    Your choice of incredible natural products like sea salt and clay for FREE. Choose from the Redmond Trading Earthpaste Bundle ($24.90 value) or the Facial Mud Bundle ($26.90 value). (Standard shipping applies. Continental US only.)

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    A $10 store credit to Union28, plus 20% off any regular price items. Their marriage apparel lets you celebrate your spouse in style. ($10.00 value. Standard shipping rates apply. International shipping available, but free shipping only available within USA.)

     

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    Your choice of 3 FREE ePlanners OR a 3-Month FREE Membership to ListPlanIt, whose mobile lists will help to organize your life. ($15.00 value. No shipping restrictions.)
     

    The fine print:

    Bonus Offers

    • Each bonus offer can be redeemed once only per eBook Bundle purchase.
    • For each bonus offer, transaction numbers or proof of purchase may be required at the time of redemption.
    • All bonus offers are free gifts from the bonus sponsors, are their sole responsibility to provide, and are subject to availability.
    • All bonus offers expire at midnight on May 25th, 2013 (3 weeks from the last day of this sale).

    General

    • It is your responsibility to download and back-up your purchase within the 1-month download time-frame. With proof of purchase, we can renew download links up until August 1st, 2013. After this date we will no longer have access to the books and will not be able to provide any new links to download.
    • Due to the nature of this sale, there will be no refunds available. However, we would invite you to read our Frequently Asked Questions page to learn more about the file types, the download process, how the bonus offers work, etc.

     

    Please note: This collection is only available from 9 a.m. EST on April 29th to 11:59 p.m. EST on May 4th. There will be no late sales offered, so make sure that you get your bundle right away!

    Particularly for those wanting to read these ebooks on their mobile devices (iPhones or iPads, Android, Kindle, etc.) you will want to learn more about the file types, how to download them correctly, and how to transfer them to your device.

    This post includes affiliate links, and I make a portion of the sale of each ebook bundle. Thanks for your support of this site!

Motherhood, Humility and Empty Vessels


It’s the one and only two preggo pictures for this, my 10th baby. You know you gotta have one. When I say “tenth baby” it’s so hard for me to believe I have ten children. I’m glad and thankful, just surprised and never imagined it for my life. It doesn’t feel like it sounds, apparently. Because when I’m out by myself and someone asks me “is this your first baby” and I say “no”, and then it’s inevitable that I must answer the hyper-ventilating-invoking question, the response feels more dramatic than my life feels.

I understand the surprise, that ten children is not exactly common. But compared with my actual life, we’re just a regular family who drives a small bus. And shares clothes. And hugs more than the average times per day. And doesn’t stress anymore about germs. And, oddly enough, is more excited at the announcement of a new baby than just about anything else on earth. And shares the housework so that really, everybody probably does less work than normal. And has to take turns talking or it can get a little out of hand at the dinner table.

I decided to take another one that showed my belly better ;-)

But other than that, I don’t feel different until we all go out in public.

Mostly, at this stage in my life, I’m humbled more than ever. And where I’m not, I’m praying to be. Andrew Murray said, in his book our family is reading again–Humility:

“True humility comes when before God we see ourselves as nothing, have put aside self, and let God be all. The soul that has done this, and can say, ‘I have lost myself in finding You,’ no longer compares itself with others.”

I think a lot about how motherhood can be so “emptying” and how maybe that’s why our culture has become a consistent enemy of motherhood, at least of the motherhood that would threaten to empty. As my husband read that sentence, I thought of how contrary it is to every message around us–even to our own flesh, and why then, there is such a gulf between what God has said is “right and good” and what everything else poses as “right and good”.

Pregnancy (since I’m here in this time of reflection) is, literally speaking, a body who “empties” part of itself to contain another human being. It’s a perfect picture of a “life-giving vessel”, emptied so it can be filled.

And so it is with us in spirit. God can only fill an empty vessel, a surrendered heart. And then, the miracle of that filling! It is only when we can reach our hands to Heaven and say with Christ, “Not my will, but Thine be done”, that we can walk in perfect peace, knowing He truly orders our steps.

So when another person says to me, “pregnancy is just so hard on your body”, intending to persuade me that I’ve “done” a silly thing by carrying another person, I can exhale with a calm knowing of the greater rewards of being emptied. I’ve had similar, encouraging epiphanies about motherhood and broken vessels. When my back hurts and round ligament pain makes me wince, I tell my children, I did it for you and it was so worth it. I don’t want pain to always be associated with something to be avoided.

Today is the anniversary of the tornado that ripped away all our earthly things. Emptying. Painful. And I can truly say I’m grateful for that life-changing event. It has helped me empty my hands of the more meaningless things in life (although I’m still working on it), to be able to hold what is most dear. I whisper a word of praise to the Father for that too, His perfect will. As a side note, I looked at some of those posts and re-read your comments the other day. Tears just streamed down my face–I probably wasn’t completely cognizant the first time I read them–and they were SUCH a huge blessing to me, two years later, as I reflected on your love and God’s goodness to put things in our lives in order to reveal such love. Thank you again.

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Along the lines of equipping ourselves to see past this world’s idea of success or happiness–to become WOMEN OF VISION–I highly recommend “The Best of Visionary Womanhood“. Packed with articles full of wisdom, solid truth and a burning vision, it will help you keep focused when all around you seem to be getting off track.

BUT…even though you can buy it now for $5.00, why not get 96 additional, INCREDIBLE books for $29.97?! Keep them all, give some as gifts, but it’s a deal you don’t want to pass up.

 

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